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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 7:52:53 GMT -5
Maybe Markise had felt Ariel looking at him, or maybe he'd just wanted to look at Ariel, but either way, he looked aside. His eyes met Ariel's somehow through all that thick hair and his fingers itched to move again. When Ariel had been in the hospital it had been so easy to let himself brush it back, but they were alone here and Markise had been feeling desperate again lately. All the checking in with Ariel helped in some ways; he didn't have to pretend all day, every day anymore. But his Friday nights were gone, if willingly, and the last person he'd been with was Ariel, and that had been almost two months ago. It had been so good, and Markise didn't know how long reminding himself of where Ariel's body had been would keep him from doing something stupid. He knew, though he didn't want to admit it to himself, that if Ariel tried, or asked, or even looked like he was about to do either, he'd probably crumble.
Now as he looked at Ariel, he couldn't think of a thing to say. His mind was on everything that had happened and everything that could happen so easily. It was taking a lot of concentration not to beg just one kiss.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 12:48:15 GMT -5
Ariel eventually turned his eyes away. He wouldn't let himself kiss Markise. It would be so nice to have one of the little black sticks he had given Markise. "You know, I'm going to ask you to let me have a smoke plenty of times this summer," he said, though he thought it was pretty obvious that he would. Whenever he was stressed, he saw himself wanting one.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 13:18:13 GMT -5
"I won't," Markise said, looking away. He couldn't help the light pout that his lips formed. He was disappointed, and so much so that there was no pretending he thought otherwise. He'd been hoping for that kiss. And now Ariel was bringing up cigarettes. It took a moment, but Markise's brain made the connection, and he looked aside at Ariel again, his mind leaping right back to where it had been only moments before. Had Ariel wanted it as badly as he did? "Do you want one now?" he asked softly. He meant the cigarette, but his mind was coming up with ways to distract Ariel from wanting one.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 17:45:08 GMT -5
Ariel closed his eyes, "I've wanted one since I left the club that night." But he hadn't done it, even with the packs in such easy reach. It would have been easy to sneak out for the few minutes it took to down one, but he hadn't, and he was rather proud of himself for that. "At least those aren't as bad as the other things." He didn't know if he ever wanted to let himself get hooked on them again, but it'd be nice to be able to do it casually. He didn't think he could control himself that well, though.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 18:07:59 GMT -5
Markise pressed his lips together, trying to force that image out of his head. It had tamed his desire to demand a kiss, at least. Tamed, but not erased. Markise opened his bag and dove in after his gum. He needed something to do with his mouth, and kissing Ariel wouldn't be much better than suggesting Ariel focus his urges elsewhere. Well, the elsewhere that he had in mind. He took a piece, holding it in one hand as he offered Ariel the pack on the unlikely chance he'd take one. He had a sudden memory of Ariel telling him to stop, that it affected him too much, but if the alternative was kissing him anyway, he couldn't see that it would hurt.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 18:11:20 GMT -5
Ariel shook his head at the offered pack, but looked over at Markise all the same. As much as he needed to figure out something to do, he didn't want to turn himself into someone that was consistently chewing gum. And he knew he would end up going through more in a day than Markise probably did in a week if that was what he chose. "I need to figure out something," he said absently.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 18:21:10 GMT -5
Markise stuffed the pack into his bag before glancing up at Ariel. "Like what?" he asked, stupid question though it might be. His mind was chanting suggestions that wouldn't be constructive for either of them. F~ me, f~ me, f~ me... Even if he had someone to get his excess energy out with, he wouldn't have the time. Unless it was with Ariel, his mind whispered. He blinked, mentally shook his head, then made quick work of unwrapping his gum, sticking it as unobtrusively as he could into his mouth.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 18:24:30 GMT -5
Ariel shook his head. "I guess...I could just start swimming all the time," he said. It had kept him sane before, he was sure it would work again. But...weren't they going to a city? "Is there anywhere to swim in New York?" he asked, looking over at Markise. It was actually going to be summer, where he could stay outside all the time and it would be hot, not this weird weather that was hot or cold depending on the hour.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 18:37:53 GMT -5
Markise looked back up, caught offguard at the seemingly sudden interruption to his thoughts. He blinked, then registered the question. "Oh, yeah, tons of places," he said. "Gyms have pools, and like, health clubs, but the public pools are too crowded to do laps or anything." And Markise couldn't imagine Ariel being happy stuck in a little area surrounded by families, especially considering he swam to relax more than to have fun. He firmly resisted the urge to blow a bubble and chomped his gum.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 18:43:02 GMT -5
Ariel wrinkled his nose at that and shifted again. "So...there aren't any that would be more private? Not that he minded swimming with others as long as they left him alone, but he had gotten very used to being the only one in the pool and he preferred it that way. But if all he could get was time surrounded by people, he supposed that was all he could do. Maybe he would end up having to join a gym, at least that would be something else to get his mind off everything.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 18:56:31 GMT -5
Markise thought, but couldn't come to much of a conclusion. "I know you can swim in some of the lakes, but I never really wondered. I mean, if we wanted to swim we'd go to one of the hotels at night." When it was dark enough not to be caught, but Markise didn't think that needed said. He gave a one-shouldered shrug, then looked aside at Ariel again. "I'll ask the guys, they spend the whole year there," he said. They'd know what was still open and everything.
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 19:04:14 GMT -5
Ariel nodded as the possibilities rolled through his head. Maybe they would be able to find out somewhere to go and he would have somewhere to spend his free time so that he wouldn't be so tempted to try other things. He knew he couldn't spend all of his free time at a gym or swimming, but he had a feeling that he wouldn't have much free time, especially with a job.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 19:29:18 GMT -5
Ariel was quiet, so Markise slipped into his thoughts again, chewing his gum absently. He was halfway through a massive bubble before he caught himself and sucked it back in as quickly and quietly as he could. He was grateful he didn't choke on it. He glanced somewhat nervously aside at Ariel afterward, firmly ignoring the tiny little voice that urged him to do it again, and with purpose. He blinked and looked away, silently lamenting. I need to get laid!
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Post by Ariel Logan Callahan on May 27, 2009 20:27:25 GMT -5
Ariel's eyes had caught on the bubble but he forced himself not to watch Markise's lips. He pulled his eyes back to whatever blank spot in the air he had been staring at before. There wasn't anything else he could think of to say, but he didn't want to leave Markise just yet. He had no idea what to do now, and he didn't want to stand there with nothing to say any more than he wanted to leave. "I...should probably go study," he said absently.
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Post by Markise Sterling on May 27, 2009 20:52:08 GMT -5
Markise's brows drew together slightly at the words, and for a moment, he only looked down at the floor, the motions of his mouth slowing. He didn't want Ariel to go. He wanted to sneak off to the Room of Requirement together and touch and be held and share kisses. He told himself it was desperation, but he knew how much he wanted Ariel, even when he shouldn't, and even when it felt wrong. He wasn't sure if it even felt wrong or not, he wanted it so much. He tried his hardest to pretend he wasn't feeling or thinking anything of the sort before he even dared to look aside at Ariel. "If you have to," he said softly.
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