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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 13:47:18 GMT -5
"God, I don't know. I didn't want to, you know, avoid him after he told me because I figured that would be hell to him. I had to turn him away today because I already had Rowan visiting, I wasn't going to you know, kick Rowan out so I could have sex with Trent. That was obviously the wrong decision to make," Keith said.
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 13:53:00 GMT -5
"No, you're right," Kane said. "You should never feel like you have to have sex with someone, but I wonder... You said you'd slept with him on three different occasions and that was all. He told you something incredibly personal, and he may have interpreted more into the relationship."
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 14:01:05 GMT -5
Keith nodded, "I was worried about that. I talked to him last time about it, too. Right now I'm not interested in a relationship and I told him that from the beginning, I said I didn't want to lead him on and he said that was fine. I probably shouldn't have taken that at face value." But he had just wanted to accept that there might not be any complications.
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 14:09:21 GMT -5
"There are a lot of different kinds of relationships," Kane said, though no doubt Keith realized that. "He could have interpreted that as not wanting a romantic relationship. Maybe he thought there was still an opportunity for friendship.
"You're throwing out assumptions that you made the wrong decision. That was obviously the wrong decision, I probably shouldn't have taken that at face value, but this situation isn't black and white, it's a lot more complicated than that. How much of this are you blaming yourself for, and why?"
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 14:17:10 GMT -5
"I didn't mind a friendship," Keith said. "I mean, really, if I had, you know, let him in today it would have been different." He couldn't imagine what might have happened with Trent, but he knew that it wouldn't have ended up with Trent holding a prefect up against the wall.
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 14:26:00 GMT -5
"That's a lot different from kicking Rowan out to have sex with Trent," Keith said. "You might think about how you feel about all this. You're giving me a lot of mixed signals. Think back hard, Keith. Did you want friendship? or did you tell yourself that you were willing to accept it? When he visited, did you believe he was there only for sex? I think you need to decide what you believe before you can tell me what actually happened."
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 14:34:30 GMT -5
Keith ran his hands through his hair. "I wasn't looking for a friend when I went to his place the first night. If we end up friends, we end up friends. I don't know what he wanted, Kane, I was dealing...I just knew that I couldn't deal with him right then." He had been dealing with Rowan and the questions being with Rowan brought.
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 14:49:57 GMT -5
"There's something you're not telling me," Kane said. "There's something you're leaving out, and I can't help you without it. This is all confidential."
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 15:22:17 GMT -5
Keith shook his head. "It's nothing. Trent knew that Rowan and I were close." He didn't want to talk about Rowan, this was about Trent. He didn't know what would happen between the two of them but they could figure it out. "I didn't want to deal with both of them at the same time."
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 15:31:10 GMT -5
"You said deal with," Kane repeated. "Was Rowan maybe more of the reason you didn't want to talk to Trent than because of his interrupting you?"
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 15:43:46 GMT -5
"We were talking about our relationship, it's complicated," Keith said, looking out into the room and away from Kane. He hadn't wanted to talk to Kane back when it had been mentioned in the past and he didn't want to do it now. Talking to Kane about Trent was different. "Stopping in the middle of the conversation wasn't something I wanted to do."
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 15:56:21 GMT -5
"Fair enough," Kane said. "I asked you earlier if you felt guilty, or rather, if you were blaming yourself. Why do you blame yourself?" Kane would keep asking until he got to the bottom of this. As little as Keith was enjoying the session, he was cooperating, and that made a big difference.
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 15:59:31 GMT -5
"I don't know," Keith repeated. "Because I Dommed for Trent that night? And he's Dommed me? And when it's as intense as it was both times it's a hell of a lot harder to ignore the guy." That was a good enough reason, right? He didn't consider the possibility that Kane wouldn't know what he meant.
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Post by Kane Garrett on Mar 24, 2012 16:02:56 GMT -5
"So you have a sort of emotional connection with Trent?" Kane asked. "Do you feel guilty because you set aside one emotional connection for another, or even that you might have chosen the wrong one?"
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Post by Keith Evans on Mar 24, 2012 16:11:53 GMT -5
"It's...a special connection, it's not like a romantic connection or anything," Keith said. "It's just really intense." But the second question made him stop and forced him to think. "Maybe, but I don't think I chose the wrong one." He had known Rowan longer, knew Rowan better, and Rowan knew him better than Trent did.
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