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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 14:48:32 GMT -5
Keith watched Dare for a few long moments as he let that sink in. "So...do you ever wonder if it would've been better to be with Markise?" It felt like it was wrong to ask such a question, but they were already so deep into all of this, and he couldn't bring himself to take it back. People had told him before that if he and Matthew were so compatible to just go for it, bu the had never even given it a second thought.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 15:01:22 GMT -5
"I have," Dare admitted. Maybe he'd never been romantically interested in Markise simply because he'd never thought of it as a possibility. He thought of it once in a while now, just a flicker now and then, though he tried to keep from wondering in specifics. He'd probably be more social, go out more. He wouldn't have had to spend so much of himself trying to prove he wasn't lying about how he felt. The physical, however little they'd had, was always so easy.
But could he have dealt with Markise's drinking? What about that desperate side of him that had always been searching for something? Dare didn't know, and any questions he might have asked himself were dead ends. He had Michael, and if he had to go back and choose again, he'd make the same choice.
"I just never thought of Markise like that. Maybe if I had, things would be different." And maybe they'd have turned out just the same.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 15:58:07 GMT -5
"But you're happy with Michael?" Keith asked, feeling again that he was stepping into dangerous territory. So no matter whatever regrets or what ifs, it had all worked out, right? Or maybe the relationship wasn't what he had thought it was. This was making him rethink the old thoughts he had had about dating Matthew.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 18:10:55 GMT -5
"God, I love Michael," Dare said. "There are things I wish we could do, but he got me through one of the hardest times of my life, and I know he'd do anything if I asked. It's amazing just seeing him smile, no matter how much I see it. Yeah, I'm happy with him. Even if I could've been happy with Markise, I couldn't give Michael up." Not for California, not for parties and clubs, and not for Markise.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 18:28:13 GMT -5
Keith smiled at that and looked over at the window. He hoped that someday he would be able to talk about someone the way Dare talked about Michael, even if everything wasn't perfect. "It sounds amazing," he said. "I was in love with my last boyfriend. I thought everything was perfect and well, let's just say it didn't end very well. It wasn't anything like what you're talking about."
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 18:36:01 GMT -5
"Things are never perfect," Dare said. "Sometimes they feel like it, and I fall for Michael all over again, but a lot of sh~ happens. The thing about Michael is we know if we hang in there, it'll work out." And he and Michael would be back to that massive crush phase, as though they'd never left it. "It'll happen when it happens. Michael and I didn't even try at first. It just... like I said, it just happened, and I knew I wanted to be with him forever."
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 18:52:59 GMT -5
Keith had thought at one point that he had found that person, but there had been no healing after fights and the bad times, simply a slow descent into the end of a long relationship. Since then he hadn't went on more than a date or two with anyone, and now look at where he was with Matthew, it was a mess. "Well, it's nice to know that it does happen, you're some pretty good proof."
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 19:00:44 GMT -5
Dare's lips quirked. "I'm an inspiration to the brokenhearted." He looked over at Keith. "Didn't mean to take over the conversation or anything," he said. "I feel better." Here he was, spilling his guts to someone who was practically a stranger. "You know, this is how it started with Michael. We just talked about all the stuff that's supposed to be so hard to talk about." Then they'd kiss, though he didn't think that needed said.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 20:21:31 GMT -5
"Yeah?" Keith asked. "Well, he doesn't have to worry about me trying to steal you or anything. And it's fine that you took over, got me out of being so damn down like I've been." He wasn't going to hold it against Dare, it had helped both of them, as far as he could tell. "Besides, I'm sure there will be a time when I'll go off on something, so we'll be even."
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 20:32:09 GMT -5
Dare gave a light chuckle. "Sure," he said. He wasn't worried about being stolen, anyway. Keith was cute and all, but if Dare was going to be with someone that size, he'd rather there be breasts attached. He mentally sighed. That was something he missed.
"So, you figure anything out, then? Tie your buddy to a chair and make him talk, or what?" The possible reality of such a situation didn't for a moment settle in Dare's mind.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 20:48:48 GMT -5
Keith laughed, probably from the tension in his body finally being gone more than anything. "Well, can't really tie him to a chair to get an answer when we're both into bondage," he said. "It wouldn't be punishment so much as foreplay." That was probably not something Dare wanted to hear, but when had Keith ever claimed to be subtle about that kind of thing?
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 20:54:02 GMT -5
Dare's eyes widened, and for a moment his expression was likely one of perfect surprise. Then he gave a bark of laughter, a more natural response from him than the near shyness about things like that, something that had begun to rub off on him after years with Michael. He wanted desperately to say something, to talk about that part of his life, but he bit his tongue, holding it back. He wouldn't risk Michael finding out and getting upset, no matter how some things bothered him.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 21:02:59 GMT -5
Keith laughed again at Dare's response. "Yeah, I kind of dropped that, didn't I? I did tell you I'd give you some stories, though, didn't I?" He reached up to rub his neck and shook his head. "No, I won't say anything unless you want me to." He didn't have any reason to hold back, but being in contact with Rowan had made him bite his tongue a little better.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on May 2, 2011 21:10:05 GMT -5
Dare shook his head, still working himself back from the chuckle he'd settled on. "Seriously, I don't mind," he assured Keith. "Used to talk like that with my friends, it was just... talking, no truth behind it. Everyone out here, they take it so seriously." At least Michael and his friends did. Although, thinking about it, they never went past innuendo.
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Post by Keith Evans on May 2, 2011 21:33:35 GMT -5
"We were always really open about it back home," Keith said. "That's why it wasn't really a big deal for me and Matthew to do stuff. It was just natural, I guess. Of course, it was weird, what we did, anyway." He paused for a moment, thinking back to when they had first gotten into the rhythm. "We'd get together with fetish groups and stuff, that's always fun. Well, almost always."
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