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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 18:44:12 GMT -5
"You must not have wanted to be with me too badly if you couldn't even give me the privilege of calling you my boyfriend! I put up with you having sex with other girls while you were with me! Silver was willing to be with me and I wanted out, Chase, how am I to know that you wouldn't just go back to how you were before?" Dru was trying to protect herself, trying to stop herself from being hurt again, though she was hurting anyway because of what was going on between her and Chase.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 19:24:14 GMT -5
"I didn't want to jinx it, Dru! I wanted to be sure I could do it, I wanted you to be able to trust me! I did it first, so you could see, so you'd know! I already showed you I can do it!" And she'd gone out and gotten herself a boyfriend now. "So you're throwing away a year--a year, Dru!--because some guy you hardly know said he'd be your boyfriend!"
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 20:00:37 GMT -5
Dru cringed, outwardly for once, and wrapped her arms around her again. "I'm sorry! I like Silver, okay? I like you, too, I'd be a liar to say I didn't, but I was going insane, Chase! You didn't want to change for me before, you were fine before me, you'll be perfectly alright without me!" She looked away from him, to hide that she didn't fully believe what she had said, she couldn't even tell herself she thought that they would both be able to go on with their lives with no problems.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 20:07:02 GMT -5
"You like me," Chase scoffed. "You more than f~ing like me, and you know I more than f~ing like you! I've been changing for you! I didn't have to stop seeing other girls, I did it because I wanted to, because I wanted you, that's why I wouldn't ask you before, I wanted you to see...And you don't even care, do you? You went off and got yourself a boyfriend, just like that! F~ you, Dru!" It hurt to say it, but Chase channeled the pain, used it to hold the pieces together as he tried to rebuild a wall around himself out of nothing.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 20:17:48 GMT -5
Pain shot instantly through Dru's chest, and she took in a few choked breaths. She wondered if she was going to be miserable like she had been after their breakup, or if she would find out that she had made the right choice. The latter seemed very unlikely at the moment, and she couldn't help feeling like she was going to end up hurting Silver by changing her mind. She turned her back to him, taking the bit of distance she could and feeling slightly less vulnerable for it. She could feel the burning begin at the bridge of her nose, in the back of her eyes. "I'm not going to go to him four days after the decision and changing my mind," she said softly.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 20:24:10 GMT -5
"Don't turn away from me!" Chase said, reaching for Dru. He pulled her around to face him, throwing out caution, throwing out that part of him that wanted to be fair, that wanted to convince her without the physical connection. "Didn't any of this mean anything to you?" he demanded, one hand hard on her arm as the other hand lifted her chin, forcing her to look at him, to see the hurt and anger blazing in his eyes. "Are you just going to walk away and forget?" He wouldn't let her forget. Chase's arm jerked, leaving Dru's to wrap around her waist, pulling her tight against him as his mouth sought hers, sought to claim it and make her too dizzy to fight.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 20:31:33 GMT -5
Even if there had been time Dru wouldn't have been able to think of a reply to him, as it was she was suddenly surrounded by him, and Silver faded like a ghost in her mind. She forgot that he had seemed under the weather before, her almost nonexistent resolve weakened quickly as everything came back to her. Her arms didn't move from their places when she found herself kissing him back, almost reflexively accepting the absence of thought he could bring so easily over her.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 20:40:01 GMT -5
He'd almost expected her to fight, and he'd braced himself for the rejection, both emotionally and physically, in the tension of his muscles. But she hadn't fought him, and so he focused that tension into the kiss, too. He'd let his walls down for her before, but he was afraid to now, and so he showed her only the desperation, the blind need he had for her, though the rest hovered so close to the surface that he wasn't sure how long he could hold on. Chase knew what Dru liked, knew how to make her weak, and he used it shamelessly, reminding her of the only thing that had ever apparently mattered. If it was all he had, then he'd use it.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 20:48:58 GMT -5
Dru couldn't make herself pull away, she had passed the point where she could pull away from his kiss, usually she couldn't pull away after a certain point, and she had just enough of her mind left to know that it would be very hard to stop. Chase had meant so much to her, she remembered it, she knew it was true, she could feel everything she had felt for him. Silver was there, as well, hovering at the edge, and Dru felt like her heart was going to explode from everything.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 20:54:40 GMT -5
Dru was still holding something back, Chase could feel it. He deepened the kiss, one hand slipping up her arm to slide her bookbag free and lower it to the floor even as he pressed her lightly back against the wall. He wanted to overwhelm her, wanted her to be unable to deny anything anymore, and so he tentatively let his walls slip, let emotion begin to creep into the kiss. How could she not know? It wasn't sex he wanted, it was her. It was the connection between them that he'd stopped denying months ago.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 21:07:07 GMT -5
Dru felt Silver there, on the edge of her mind, or what was left of it. She tried to pull Silver into her mind deeper, and an image of him filtered into her mind's eye. The emotions she could feel both from Chase and coming from deep within her own chest confused and hurt her. She turned her head away from Chase, breaking the contact of their lips. She could feel a warm wetness coming from the corners of her eyes which were squeezed shut.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 21:11:48 GMT -5
Chase inhaled deeply, quickly, trying to get back some of the air he'd lost during the long moments of their kiss. "Don't do this, Dru," he said, his voice low. "Don't throw this away." One hand rose to her jaw, turning her face toward his as he tried to kiss her again, tried to summon something that had to be enough. If she couldn't want him, she could at least want this.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 17, 2008 21:23:49 GMT -5
"I can't just go back and break up with him," Dru argued softly, her lips moving against his as she spoke and pulled her head back. She found herself wanting to be with Chase, just like she always did, but she couldn't bring herself to be with him, not when she could still remember how happy she had been with Silver. "It's not fair that I've wanted you for so long...and now..." She had found someone she could be happy with and Chase decide he wanted to be with her.
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Post by Chase Firebrand on Aug 17, 2008 21:38:13 GMT -5
"Then be with me," Chase said, refusing to back off and give Dru the space to think. "You hardly know him, it hasn't been that long, he'll be fine." Something in the back of his mind told him that it wasn't fair to ask her to do that when he was so physically close, that it wasn't fair when he knew she couldn't think straight, but fair didn't seem to matter to him right now, even if he knew that he couldn't be sure if there was anything more than the physical this way.
Chase gritted his teeth at the thought. This wasn't right, wasn't what he wanted, even if it was the only way to get what he wanted. Chase's muscles tensed, then he forced himself to step back, to give Dru breathing room. "Just tell me this, Dru," he said, forcibly ignoring the thread of vulnerability in his voice, "Without sex, do you feel anything for me?" It seemed like it was the only way he held on anymore.
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Post by Druscilla Grace on Aug 18, 2008 7:10:22 GMT -5
Dru didn't mention the fact that she had always felt something for him, even before sex, in her mind it was when they had started having sex that everything had gone downhill. She wished she could lie, that she could tell him that she felt nothing for him, then she could leave, but she couldn't. She nodded, "Yes, you know that." He wouldn't have been in her thoughts so much if she didn't. Chase was making more and more sense, "Do you think I haven't thought about all of that? It wasn't just a decision I made when he sat down beside me."
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