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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 21:56:04 GMT -5
Michael nodded and looked over at Dare, examining his face before looking down at their hands, unable to meet Dare's eyes while speaking. "Neither did I," he paused, debating, then, tilting his head down a little farther and letting his hair fall around his face, he spoke. "But it's too soon for anything else....I can't do anything more," he said, his eyes glued to their hands. He didn't know why it was hard to admit, perhaps it was because it felt like a lie when pitted against the tension in his muscles and the heat in his blood.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:03:33 GMT -5
Dare shook his head, for all the good it did with neither of them looking at the other. "I'm not ready," he said. "I mean...I wanted...something, but I don't want to go that far. God, it's so confusing!" Dare lifted his head, looking up into the clouds, still not even realizing how very exposed and in the open they were. He let out a long breath and squeezed Michael's hand again, then brought his gaze down, turning to look at Michael. But Michael wasn't looking at him. He dropped his gaze to their hands.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:14:24 GMT -5
Michael nodded, he knew what Dare felt, because he felt the same. He shifted his arm to where the inside of their forearms were touching more than from just holding hands, feeling comforted by the extra thread of contact. "I know," he said needlessly, though he wished Dare knew. It would have been so much easier if one of them knew what was going on and how to go about it, but they were on their own.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:25:14 GMT -5
Dare shook his head again, a gesture of insecurity, of being unsure what he was doing. "You think people just...give in so they don't have to think about it?" he asked softly. He wasn't entirely certain either way. Having pushed so close to loss of control, he knew how tempting it was to rationalize just crossing that one line, but thinking about it after...it was a lot. It was overwhelming.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:35:40 GMT -5
"It seems easier, doesn't it," Michael said, thinking that it was probably something that happened quite a bit, especially if the experience was as intense as theirs had been. He didn't know that it would be worth it, though, what if it happened and then the participants regretted it? Or if they couldn't go back to the relationship they had been in before? "But it doesn't seem right to give in because of that," he mused, glancing over at Dare.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:41:13 GMT -5
Dare lifted his gaze to meet Michael's. "No, it doesn't," he agreed. "But how are you supposed to stop, when..." He glanced away, lips quirking reflexively as his gaze returned to Michael. "You know," he finished. Of course he knew. Dare had felt it from Michael almost as heavily as he'd felt it in himself, and it was amazing, unbelievable.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:50:58 GMT -5
Michael's lips curved up lightly and he nodded, "Yeah, I know." He had confidence, though, that they would be able to stop until they were ready. "It's hard to stop," he said, "But I guess it'll all be better in the end if we do, right? Isn't that what they feed us?" Of course, the ones that said that were usually the biggest hypocrites Michael had ever met.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 22:57:12 GMT -5
"I guess," Dare said. "I don't know, my last school had a policy of don't talk about it and it won't happen, and my parents..." He trailed off at that. His parents had been big believers in love conquering all. It didn't seem right bringing that up, though. Not when, for all that they could read each other, for all that they wanted each other, they hadn't known each other nearly long enough to throw words like that around.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 23:07:03 GMT -5
Michael squeezed Dare's hand lightly, "We'll figure it out when it's right." Michael had no idea when it would be right, but he did know that it would work out when it needed to, probably when they thought it would never happen. "In the meantime, I suppose we'll just have to deal with this wonderful tension when we kiss," he said, smiling softly. The wonderful could be taken as sarcasm, but he had come to almost enjoy the tension and the pleasant sensations that came along with it.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 23:14:39 GMT -5
Dare's lips curved unwillingly into a smirk that widened into his crooked smile after a moment. He shook his head, his eyes laughing when he finally raised them to Michael. "It's not supposed to be funny," he said, though it was obvious that he didn't mind. The tension was wonderful. Terrifying, on occasion, overwhelming every time, but wonderful all the same. Dare brought their hands up, turning them to press a kiss to the back of Michael's. "I'm glad I'm figuring it out with you," he said.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 23:21:40 GMT -5
Michael matched Dare's move, kissing the back of his hand, silently agreeing with him before actually speaking. "Maybe it's not supposed to be funny, but I fall into those moods enough without you joining me," he said, smiling. He searched Dare's eyes, examining the sparkle in them, before his eyes fell momentarily to his lips. "You know," he said, his eyes going back up to Dare's while he still could, "I love your smile." Michael's eyes fell quickly at the confession, seeking the safety of their hands.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 23:32:43 GMT -5
Dare's smile widened at Michael's words, and his gaze dropped as well, but only for a brief moment before rising to watch Michael. "I don't smile this much for anyone else," he admitted. He and Michael just seemed to work off each other so well that it came naturally. Dare's free hand reached out, smoothing back a lock of hair from his face. "I love your hair," he confessed, letting his gaze slip over Michael's features. "And your eyes. I love watching your eyes." He loved the play of emotion, the way Michael's eyes could show both sides of him at the same time, dark and light, noble and rebel all at once.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 12, 2008 23:45:30 GMT -5
Michael smiled and let his eyes find their way up to Dare's, "Do I even need to return the sentiment?" he asked, flicking his gaze up to Dare's hair. He did love Dare's hair and eyes, but Michael was more drawn to his smile than any of the other things. "Of course, your hands, that goes without saying," he said, his free hand coming over to run his fingertips lightly over the back of Dare's hand.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 13, 2008 10:52:22 GMT -5
Dare chuckled, his heart so light he felt like he could float away with it. "Yeah, it goes without saying," he agreed, eyes shining as he watched the motion of Michael's fingers. "I never paid as much attention to hands as I do now," he said absently. It was easy to see they fascinated Michael, though, and easy to be fascinated as well.
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Post by Michael Blackwood-Hardt on Jul 13, 2008 11:04:40 GMT -5
"Most people don't pay any attention," Michael said, "I don't know why, they can do so much." He pulled his hand up and moved his fingers, waving them in a pattern in front of his eyes. He smiled and looked over at Dare, "I remember looking at mom's when I was little." Then he remembered the reason Dare had moved and looked away, bringing his hand back down to the back of Dare's.
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