Corrupt a Wish

[Markise Sterling]

Granted, but your future is filled with little other than the grilled cheese obsession you develop over the next week.

I wish I could start and stop time at will.

[Annabelle Hennessy]

granted, but you stop with the time too, so it does no good.

I wish I had a time tuner to use at will.

[Markise Sterling]

Granted, but since it's broken, you use it as a fancy necklace.

I wish I had perfect vision.

[Annabelle Hennessy]

granted, but it doesn't do anything for horrible foresight.

I wish foresight was like hindsight....

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, but you're too stubborn to listen to your foresight anyway.

I wish I could graduate immediately upon completion of my useless papermaking class.

[Jewels Tyler]

Granted, but by graduating immediately you don't learn the rest of the topic and have to repeat it.

I wish I didn't have to do summer reading for school.

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, but you have to do summer road-paving instead.

I wish I was independently wealthy.

[Melody Krysten]

Granted but now you have independently higher taxes (if that makes sense...)

I wish people would stop telling me to talk slower.

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, they stop telling you to talk slower, but since no one reminds you, no one can make out a word you said!

I wish that I had half a million dollars in my bank account, so I could pay for my education.

[Annabelle Hennessy]

Granted, but you use it all on education and don't have any left for your move to California!

I wish I could fall asleep at night, before the clock turns to the next day, without taking any pills or anything like that.

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, but night means 7:30, so you have to rush to get everything done before then.

I wish I could eat as much of anything I wanted with no repercussions.

[Verity Bromley]

Granted, but even though you can eat whatever you want...you don't want anything.

I wish I could focus on the task I need to instead of getting sidetracked.

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, and when your task is complete you realize someone stole the house from around you, and you didn't notice because you were so focused.

I wish I got paid for writing RP.

[Verity Bromley]

Granted, but you must donate all your money to rehabilitated ex-porn stars.

I wish the laundry would just wash itself

[Dare Blackwood-Hardt]

Granted, but since it has a mind of its own now, it refuses to submit to your slavery and takes off to start a commune, leaving you entirely without clothes.

I wish I had a better car.