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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 22:16:56 GMT -5
"Markise, no," Dare said, rolling to wrap his arms around his friend. "You're not a whore, come on. Sometimes things just happen, right?" Dare nearly winced at saying that. He didn't believe it, but he wanted Markise to be all right. He wanted the quietly assured Markise, the tease he'd known at school. Behind Markise's back, Dare's left hand rose to stroke against his hair. He'd forgotten how soft it was. Markise had helped him with his own hair or it would still be coarse as a hippogriff's ass.
"Come on, Markise. You're not a bad person, I know you. You're impulsive, like me. He didn't pay you, did he? He doesn't look like he could afford you. You've gotta be at least a couple Galleons."
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 22:20:45 GMT -5
Markise chuckled at Dare's tease, and one of his hands rose to wipe carefully at his eyes. Then he returned it to its place against Dare and shuffled closer, tucking his head beneath Dare's. "I'm worth a couple hundred galleons, and don't you forget it," Markise teased back. He brought his arms comfortably around Dare and squeezed his eyes shut, praying to a diety he wasn't sure existed that he could just freeze this moment and stay here forever. Here, where he didn't doubt himself and he felt worth something. Here, where he could hear Dare's steady heartbeat. "I miss this," Markise said softly.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 22:31:48 GMT -5
Dare's eyes closed now, and he was brought back to those years of friendship, and those brief months where they'd been something undefinable. Then he thought of Michael, of his warning that Markise wanted him, and for the first time, he could feel it. He felt so comfortable like this, so at home, but in his mind, it was strange. No, he corrected himself. It was like their first kiss, strange because it didn't feel strange. I miss this, too, he wanted to say, but he couldn't. There was no way. Still, he murmured, "You're worth a million galleons."
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 22:35:38 GMT -5
Markise couldn't stand it. Did Dare know yet? Hadn't he guessed it? Michael knew, but had he told Dare? Still, it felt different somehow. There was a tension, an almost desperation in the feel of Dare's arms around him that he'd never felt before. Markise shifted lightly against Dare and stretched his legs, trying to find out without making things awkward by asking. He just wanted to know. Dare was in love. But it felt like he loved Markise, too.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 22:38:26 GMT -5
Dare sucked in a sharp breath at that motion of Markise's body against his. Physically it felt good, but it terrified him. Yes, he loved Markise, but it had never gone past their strong friendship and that brief almost romance they'd had. Dare's arms released Markise, and he pulled back, just enough to look down at his friend. It could have been perfectly innocent. Markise had never even suggested doing more during those months, never even hinted at it. He'd been sure that Markise had felt the same way he had.
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 22:41:26 GMT -5
Markise had felt so much more, and for so long that it was a kind of relief seeing that knowledge in Dare's eyes. Markise couldn't speak any more than Dare could, but at times like this, words were a distraction. "Just once," Markise pleaded softly. "For old times' sake." He had to know if Dare was feeling it too. He didn't know if it would make it better or worse knowing, and knowing that he couldn't have it ever again. Dare wanted to marry Michael.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 22:44:37 GMT -5
"No, I can't," Dare said, though the words felt... hollow, somehow. "I love Michael." But some part of him did wonder. Could he feel that way about Markise? He wouldn't--couldn't--find out, but thoughts were harmless. They were only thoughts, after all. Dare had the thought that he should sit, that he should stand and walk away from the bed, but he didn't want to lose Markise, and something in him was afraid that if he just walked away, if he didn't stay to try talking this out, he might lose that friendship.
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 22:54:18 GMT -5
"I know you love him," Markise said, his eyes pleading with him. "But forever is a long time to wonder, isn't it?" His heart could barely take this. He was going to die of a heart attack at 16 just from the roller coaster of his life. "Just once, I swear, and I'll never ask again. I swear I won't tell." He wouldn't, not for as long as he lived. But Dare knew now, and though Markise couldn't read minds, couldn't read thoughts, he could read body language just enough to know that some part of Dare was thinking about it, and maybe wanting it, too.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 22:58:01 GMT -5
Dare's brows knitted. "Don't ask me to do this," he whispered. Even if Markise never told, Dare would know, and the guilt would eat at him. Yes, part of him wanted it, and the more Markise asked, the weaker he felt. But he had enough self-control for two, and so he didn't move forward again, didn't lick his lips to soften them. He worked at his lip ring, and that was all. "I can't do it. The last time is going to have to be the last." But forever is a long time. He was only just seventeen. Dare squeezed his eyes tight and refused to look at those blue eyes anymore.
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 23:11:12 GMT -5
Markise's gaze dropped to that lip ring, and when Dare closed his eyes, he struggled even more than he had before. He looked at Dare, able to tell just by the way his clothes fell that he'd bulked up a bit more over the summer. He wasn't the same stick with limbs he'd been at thirteen. I can't do it, he'd said. "If you can't, then don't," Markise said at last. "Let me."
He didn't give Dare a chance to respond, didn't give him a chance to register the words and pull away. Markise wanted this, and he'd taken enough initiative with Ariel that he had little difficulty taking it now. His words had only just left his mouth before the sound of a zipper tore through the quiet.
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 23:14:50 GMT -5
Dare gasped in shock, his eyes flying open at the feel of... He couldn't think, it was all so unexpected that he didn't know what to do, he couldn't think. "No, no, you can't do..." His words were cut off, replaced by a low, guttural sound. He wanted to think, and he brought his hands down, but he couldn't seem to grab anything, couldn't make his hands work that well. It didn't even strike him that Markise knew what he was doing until it was over and he lay breathless and stunned. That hadn't just happened. It hadn't. Despite the fact that he could feel his pants being zipped back up.
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 23:17:13 GMT -5
Markise slid back a little now and looked up at Dare. He could hardly believe he'd done that either, but Dare's responses, his inability to pull away, had been all the answer he'd needed. Dare did feel that way, or at least he did now. At least he had then. One of Markise's hands reached up and swept lightly against his mouth before moving out to smooth Dare's hair out of the way. "Are you okay?" he asked softly. "Did it... feel good?"
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 23:19:52 GMT -5
Dare couldn't even laugh at the ridiculousness of that question. It had felt... he hadn't been able to pull away. He hadn't stopped it. And Michael. Dare finally looked aside at Markise. "Swear you'll never tell anyone," he said. "And swear you'll never do that again." He didn't know how he was going to be able to live with this. He didn't know how he and Michael would survive, didn't think they would if he found out. But he loved Michael. And you love Markise, his mind whispered. He was going to marry Michael. He couldn't let Michael go.
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Post by Markise Sterling on Nov 25, 2008 23:23:19 GMT -5
Markise blinked. "We have to tell," he said, scooting closer to Dare again. "You can't go back to him after that. I... I love you, Dare, I have for years and I never said anything." He licked his lips and glanced away. "I thought you were straight for so long, and then when we were together I thought about it. And then I went stupid and went back to Kwami, but I want you Dare, more than I've ever wanted anything! Please, just think about it!"
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Post by Dare Blackwood-Hardt on Nov 25, 2008 23:31:45 GMT -5
Dare was so torn. A few months ago, he hadn't even known what love was. He'd always believed that there was someone out there for everyone, and you just needed to find them. What could he think now? The two best friends he'd ever had, and he loved them. What was that called? Polyamory? No, he couldn't believe it, he wouldn't. But he loved them. "I can't... I'll... I'll think about it," he said at last. "I'll think about it." Michael would think it was about sex, and in a way it was. It was connecting sex with Markise, something he hadn't thought of before. It wasn't about what he was or wasn't getting from Michael. Michael. He still wanted Michael, wanted to marry him. "Don't say anything," he pleaded.
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